Empathetic Joy is one of the Four Immeasurables, the capacity to feel genuine happiness for the well-being and success of others. Or more simply, rejoicing in the goodness of others. Last week at Esalen, while teaching on these qualities with my dear friend Eve Ekman, I was reminded just how alive and powerful this practice can be.
While we were there, we heard the beautiful news that His Holiness the Dalai Lama received a Grammy Award for his audiobook Meditations: The Reflections of His Holiness the Dalai Lama. I felt a spontaneous surge of happiness, a warmth that surprised me in its intensity. That feeling of joy for him opened a door to a memory from many years ago.
In 1989, during my first trip to India and Nepal, I traveled through Ladakh and Kashmir. At that time, I knew very little about the Dalai Lama, yet I was deeply moved by the immense reverence Tibetan monks held for him. The monks I met in the monasteries in Ladakh were incredibly kind with me. Even though we shared no common language, they offered me a place to sleep and food to eat. We communicated with our eyes, our hands, and our smiles. It was a simple and profound exchange of shared humanity.
Later, after visiting the sacred Amarnath Cave, I was on my way back toward Kashmir and staying with a generous Muslim family. It was there that we heard the news that His Holiness the Dalai Lama had received the Nobel Peace Prize. I remember feeling an unexpected and heartfelt joy, almost as if someone in my own family had been honored. That moment stayed with me. It was my first clear experience of empathetic joy beyond a friend or family member. It was a happiness not rooted in my own achievements, or those close to me, but in the goodness and recognition of another that i barely knew.
Hearing now, decades later, that he received a Grammy awakened that same feeling again. Of course, the context is different; the world has changed, and so have I, but the essence of that empathetic joy remains the same. There is something deeply nourishing about allowing ourselves to celebrate the success, wellbeing, and recognition of others. It is like a smile that comes from the heart rather than the face.
I invite you to notice these moments in your own life. When someone you know, or even someone you do not know, experiences success or happiness, see if you can pause and open your heart. Let yourself feel glad for them. It is a subtle but transformative practice that softens the mind and connects us more deeply with one another.
Here is a link to the audiobook:
In the coming months, I will be engaging in several gatherings and teachings, and I will also be returning to Nepal, to my teacher’s monastery, the retreat place where he spent his final days and where he passed away in meditation. These journeys continue to remind me of the importance of lineage, gratitude, and the simple power of the heart. For more information, email me at info@alechaoul.com.
May we continue to cultivate empathetic joy together, celebrating the light we see in others and allowing it to illuminate our own path.
With warmth,
Ale










